Local Klansman Turns Pink
May. 1, 2004
In what's being called a local wardrobe malfunction, area resident and Klansman Arnie Stevens showed up at his latest Ku Klux Klan rally in a pink hood and a pink robe.
"They say it happened because I didn't separate my whites from my coloreds," said Arnie. "That just goes to show you segregation is the way of the Lord. In laundry and also in life."
"The little missus was at a Tupperware convention so I had to my own laundry," explained Arnie. A former bachelor, Arnie hauled his dirty Klansman outfit to the local washtub and what followed no one could foresee. Although the real culprit is probably a wayward Cincinnati Reds tee-shirt, Arnie tends to believe his washer was tampered with by some of the young African American men, or as Arnie called them, "homies" loitering around the shop.
"Someone sabotaged that there washer. Sure as I know niggers are black, I know I separated my coloreds from my whites." He continued, "There's something rotten in Denmark around here. The name of the laundromat is Rub a Dub Scrub. Need I say more?" And then he said no more.
Conspiracy or not, the mishap did ot discourage the lifelong KKK member from attending his monthly Klansman rally, held in his hometown, Pigeon Hole, Oklahoma. But because his robe and hood were both an unfortunate shade of flamingo pink, Arnie was immediately asked to go home, on the suspicion of being a homosexual.
"Unfortunately my fellow Klansman judged me solely on the color of my robe. But I can't help it what color my robe is. What's inside is what counts," said Arnie, wiping back a tear.